“Ke.. Ici Nicio Cafi cia gwakwa. ( Take, these are the keys to my house)” He said as he stretched out his hands waving a bunch of keys towards her.
“This one opens the main entrance, This one opens the kitchen door, Ino ni ya store, Ino ingi ni ya kwa nguku. Nayo ino niyo most important. Ni ya Master bedroom. Kuria urikomaga. (This one is the most important. It opens the door to the master bedroom, where you will be sleeping) Ici igiri ni cia bedroom icio ingi(These two open the other two bedrooms) na cio ici ni cia kurituhia cafi incase cingigua ninguigua” (The rest are on the bunch to add weight just in case the keys fall, you’ll hear the sound) He added in finality as he waited the slay queen to pick up the keys.

“What kind of man is this? We just met. Does he even know my second name to even start telling me about where I’ll be sleeping? Mschheeew!! Nkt!! and Four other expressions meaning the same thing.” Shie wondered to herself as she looked at the poor thing with dark sullen eyes, pupils dilated lust showing all over his face. She wondered why he had picked her out from the pack of ladies she normally walks in. Again, this kaman though, should she even give him this much airtime?

Men of class are following her left right and centre. Seeking her number like it’s their leeway to heaven. Her pack is best known for the socialites and slay queens around campus. Their mere presence in your bash is the licence to stardom. People seek them out as arsenal seeks a trophy. And now here he is. Trying to Katia the best of them all. The paradigm of beauty. She slays the slay queens themselves. Her hair is the talk of town. Her shape almost got a sophomore dead as he was overrun by a bodaboda guy as his eyes strolled after her. He was only saved because the bodaboda guy had also slowed down to have a glimpse of her behind. Her ass speaks volumes, It speaks for itself.

“Mzee, Kwanza, your coat is oversize. Secondly, I don’t know you, we just met. On a sidewalk. Do you even know what that is? Ni apa penye tumesimama. Mscheew!! Go find a kimama downtown. Kule kwa those changaa dens labda unawezapata mtu wa class yako. Look and look at me well. My class is way up here.” She stretched her hand up to the furthest it could reach.

“Yours is somewhere below those boots of yours that speak of days without water and polish. So if you excuse me, I have an appointment with the dean of faculty” She started walking away then stopped.

“Oh, and take this number. 0700845…. It’s my boyfriends. He owns that jeep over there. The one and only around here. He could give you better pick up lines….. Tukatiane 101.”

Then she walked away swaying her hips you’d think they were running on K.P.L.C generated energy. The man was already too ashamed to say a thing. Especially by the kamammoth crowd that had started forming around thanks to Shie’s loud voice. He walked fast away from the crowd towards the same direction as shie. Zoomed past her the way speed bikes overtake your matatu on Thika road. You’d think your mat is not moving. He could hear the ladies laugh sarcastically behind him.

Deans Office

30 mins later.
Knock Knock.
Knock Knock.
“Please come in” A voice called from inside.

Shie took her time as she always does, unbuttoned her top to reveal… well… The two hills even with all the buttons intact normally had men salivating. How about now? Then she walked in. Swaying her hips slowly and gracefully towards the dean’s desk. Her steps well articulated as though calculated. Then she stopped midway.
“Whaaat!!” She exclaimed.
There seated behind that desk was the Kaman. TF is happening? Changed into decent attire and a tie. Slyly smiling at her. That smile that says, “It’s my turn now” She felt like leaving the room. He was still seated. Composure all over him and a sense of pride lingering over his face.
“Hi beautiful, what took you so long?”
************************


Gusto

Witty guy. Humorous is my first name, Funny is my second. Average is my below average. Blogger, Actor, Trained Journalist. Jesus is my best friend,

Comments

Related Posts

Blog

Guerilla Gusto – My Contribution to the Maumau uprising

In one of my many statuses on WhatsApp (you know those people who post statuses as if they have Shares onWhatsApp?) I’m not one of them.  Am of the Maumau era.  In one of my Read more…

Blog

MOsqUiToeS

Do mosquitos have like a celebratory buzz or noise or something when they are happy? Say like its sucked all the blood out of you and need to celebrate its victory. Ama it wants to Read more…

%d bloggers like this: